Ex-Juicers for Jesus?

By Joe Pietaro
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Updated: May 28, 2008

MuscleMissions.org – More Cult Following Than Good Intentions

Happened upon this website and I’m still not sure of their entire agenda. From what I gather, they are a group of reformed steroid users who have “seen the light.” They now feel compelled to get the message out there that the entire sport of bodybuilding is a quagmire of sin.

They go pretty far with their message, even asking the question if the late Dan Duchaine (“The Steroid Guru” and author of the “Underground Steroid Handbook”) is burning in hell right now?

The article (http://www.musclemissions.org/public/99.cfm) states that Duchaine may be “paying” for his evil-doing with his soul possibly being tormented for eternity, and that the stroke that he suffered in the early 1990s may have been ‘heaven sent,’ if you know what I mean.

Perhaps the most preposterous remark is when they refer to the last article Duchaine wrote before his untimely death in 2000, which is described as being “geared towards children,” and including instructions on taking massive amounts of test for their first cycle. Because Duchaine titled this article “Dick and Jane’s First Steroid,” and used the term ‘boys’ in it, only someone looking for controversy would associate it with actual children.

Being a fellow writer, I totally understand the direction and flow that Duchaine was looking for with the way he penned the piece. It was not meant to be taken literally, it was suggestive work meant to show comparisons on how once a bodybuilder reaches a certain age (body-wise and mentally), they move away from steroid use, but there is always the next generation ready to take their place to keep the subculture alive.

Dennis L. Bates, the person behind this site, appears to have good intentions and doesn’t want to see people making some of the same mistakes that he did, but there are limits to show that. He has his book, “Anabolic Outlaw – I Was a Drug Dealing, Pot Smoking, Cocaine Snorting, Pill Popping, Acid Dropping, Whiskey Drinking, Steroid Shooting Bodybuilder” there, which can be read for free.

Not passing any judgment, but dropping tabs of acid and blowing lines up your nose are a completely different area than using PEDs. Because he decided to use all of the above does not make a bodybuilder using limited amounts of something an automatic devil worshipper.

Want a taste? Bodybuilders using witchcraft to further muscle gains; I.F.B.B. logo and stage backdrop containing occult symbols; Arnold using sorcery during filming of “Pumping Iron,” and more than I care to look up right now.

Draw your own conclusions. But if you ask me, this is in the same category as the Branch Davidians or Heaven’s Gate without the body count.